My uncle had a sign in his lake house, "Guests and fish both begin to stink after 3 days."

I've tried to remember that, and have tried to be a good guest wherever I go.

Nearly five years ago, my Grandpa moved in with us. He was in his last months and I had always hoped to help with him. When we moved to Texas, he followed a few months later. It was a wonderful experience most of the time, special moments I wouldn't trade for anything. It was difficult at times, too, watching somebody I love so incredibly dearly fade in front of my eyes. But we were able to have a wonderful time together, and we are blessed to have that. To help ease things, he paid me a stipend every month. That helped with the medical care, extra food, utilities, etc. He also paid to build us a shed for my office, so that he could have the spare bedroom. He helped when he could, and we gelled as an extended family.

Fast forward. Earlier this year, my biological dad asked if he could use our home as his home base. He's a traveling salesman, and his current living situation was ending. He needed a place to call home between working on the road. I figured it would be a great chance for him to get to know my kids. Darren and I talked about it, and agreed.

My question is, at what point does a guest become a member of the family? What should they contribute? What rules should they follow? What's realistic?

I'm really struggling with this right now. It's tough. Our whole family is being affected, and not in a positive way. I'm stressed and sick. ANY input appreciated. Even if this is my problem, and not his.

Thanks.